Meaning, Motivation, and Message

I have an Asian sibling, 4 Asian cousins, 2 Puerto Rican cousins, 1 Dominican cousin,
4 black and latino in-laws and 5 mixed babies in my family.
They say I can't wear white shirts, because Im so light it looks like Im naked.
I ask them how they can see through their chinky eyes.
They say that I lose when we play cops and robbers at night because I glow in the dark.
I give them a hard time when it takes them an hour to get one knot out of their hair.
They merciless taunt me when I come back looking like a lobster after being in the sun the first day of summer.
I yell "chino!" They yell "casper!"
And the family portraits drawn by the little kids are hilarious.

Its the way it is. We love each other, but I'm sure that every single day at least one person says something" racist" to someone else. That leads me to question whether racism is less an issue of words, but rather motive. Even when we do impressions of each other, I'm sure we do things that "racially-sensitive" souls would cringe at. We aren't maliciously bashing each others' "foreign-ness", though. We are comically pointing out our differences.
There's nothing wrong with that, because our message is ultimately one of care. Of course we give each other a hard time, but that doesn't mean we do anything out of the attitude that one of us is better because of our DNA structures or the color of our skin.
We understand that love and family surpasses all that.
I guess the point I want to make is that as we go through our daily life and "racist" comments, words, and images bombard us, we should look below surface level and try to find the true motives present at the time. Certain things have very potent meanings, but sometimes the ultimate message a person is trying to convey could be different that the typical connotation that that thing carries. I'm not trying to excuse or justify anything, only to challenge everyone to look a little deeper before they pull the racist card or get offended.

the N-word

Race issues seem to come up a lot in my daily life because of where i was born and who I am around most of my life. I am used to being surrounded by blacks, Latinos, and Asians in inner city settings. One of the biggest issues that comes up is the use of the N-word. Honestly, most people have wack ideas of the appropriateness or inappropriateness of the word. The people I respect are those who deem it inappropriate for all or appropriate for all.
I just don't get it when black people just throw around the word all day long, use it about and direct it towards white people and then get really mad if a white person even thinks about using it. Now, I'm not ignorant, I know that the N-word has extremely negative connotations and has been used by whites very wrongly in the past. I just don't get why the black population seems to want to keep the term in circulation so bad. Even more so, I don't get why the black population will use it right to their white friends faces, but then get really angry when their white friends use it back in a completely amicable way? When a black person has a white friend or girlfriend or wife and he calls her the n-word in a joking, kind context, why is it a mortal sin for her to do the same? It just seems inconsistent. To me, if you use it with some, you should allow them to use it with you. And if it offends you so much when you hear some people say it, you shouldn't be cool with furthering its use yourself.

Nasty, but needs to be questioned

lyrics (abridged version)
http://www.moron.nl/lyrics/lil-wayne/lollipop-lyrics.html
I Said he's so sweet
Make her wanna lick the rapper
So I letta lick the rapper
She she she lick me like a lollipop
She she lick me like a lollipop

[Chorus:] Shawty wanna thug (thug thug)
bottles in the club (club club)
shawty wanna hump and
ooo i like to touch ya lovely lady lumps

[Verse 1:Lil Wayne]
Okay, lil mama had a swag
like mine even wear her hair
down her back like mine
i make her feel right when
its wrong like lyin
Man, she ain never had a love like mine
but man i aint never seen a ass like hers
that pussy in my mouth
had me at a loss fo words
i told her to back it up like erp erp and
make that ass jump like shczerp shczerp
and thats when
she she she lick me like a lollipop( oh yeah i like that ) s
he she lick me like a lollipop ( oh yeah i like that )

[Verse 2:]
Shawty said the nigga that she with aint shit
Shawty said the nigga that she with aint this
Shawty said the nigga that she with cant hit
But shawty ima hit it(hit it) like i cant miss
And i cant do this and i dont do that shawty
needa a refund needa bring that nigga back
Just like a refund i tell her bring that ass back
and she bring that ass back (because i like that)

[Chorus:] Shawty wanna thug (thug thug)
bottles in the club (club club)
shawty wanna hump and
ooo i like to touch ya lovely lady lumps
Shawty call me so i can make it juicy fo ya
Call ca call me so so i can get it juicy fo ya
Call ca ca call me so so i can make it juicy fo ya
Ca Call me so so so i can get it juicy fo ya
Ca Call me so i can make it juicy fo ya

I get her on top she drop it like it hot
and when im at the bottom she Hilary Rodham
then we in the bed givin gettin head ( givin gettin head givin gettin head )
said mmmm i like that said
mmmm i like that i said mmmm i like that
yea i like that mmm mmmmm
Call me so i can come and do it fo ya
Call me so i can come and prove it fo ya
Call me so i can make it juicy fo ya
Call me so i can get it juicy fo ya
Shawty wanna li li li li lick me like a lollipop
She she lick me like a lollipop (lollipop)
Said he's so sweet
Make her wanna lick the rapper
So i let her lick the rapper

So even posting these lyrics on my page is making me sick to my stomach. I really don't even know where to begin. I hate this song. I think its demeaning to women. I think it has absolutely no message except one of trashy selfishness and it bothers me even more that it has become a hit. But, honestly, I'm not even gonna focus on the gender issue.
The biggest question I have is if this music video is a picture of what the black community wants to promote as the black man: a guy with a limo-van filled with half naked women all wanting to give him oral sex? Its weird, but I feel like if a white man were to put out this same video, he would be looked more at like a disgrace. I don't think he would be gettin repped as much. However, when a black man puts forth this image, he is mad popular and he gets mad money. Why? Do black people have a certain unspoken leniency? What is it more approved of of black music artist to talk about such themes in such language and its not looked down upon by the majority of society, but instead acknowledged as a man doing big things?
Maybe I'm just not seeing something, but there seems to be a double standard. In this case. seemingly to the benefit of black males, but I think to the detriment of black culture as a whole.

The RACIST napkin

So, last year my friends had this thing where they would hold up a napkin with the word RACIST written on it every time they felt like I made a racist comment. Apparently, this happened frequently enough that they actually began to carry around napkins with them where ever we would go.
Let me explain that the crew was usually all black kids except for me.

I am a very inquisitive person and I am not afraid to say what I'm thinking or voice any questions I might have.

One night we were all in the cafeteria and one of our mutual (black) friends was talking to us and said that he had to run over to another building real fast. I immediate thought of the countless comments from my friends about the way I walk and the way "white people" walk in general. "Like they are running" they said.

I wanted to clarify something.
Working off of the "non-racist" comments that white people run when (to me) they are just walking, I asked my friend when he said he had to "run" over to that building, whether he meant he was just going to walk really fast.
I wasn't trying to be smart.
I was genuinely curious.
The words barely got out my mouth and the napkins were whipped out and pushed in front of my face.
I don't get it. Why can black people make statements and there is never any grounded offense, but a white person asks a question and everyones accusing you of racism.
What do you think?

Racial (slurring) Privilege

Watch:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r-bA9FYB8HY&feature=related

Rush Hour is an interesting movie when it come to comedy, audience and race. At first glance does the movie have racist elements? Chris Tucker makes fun of Jackie Chan's Asian character a lot, assuming that he couldn't speak English when he first meets him, and assuming along with other things that the martial arts are just something for show that "your corny ass does." But when Tucker and Chan go into a bar and Chan greets the bartender by saying "Whats good, my nigga" he gets beat down (not by Tucker but by others). To me, the way stereotypes and racial bashing go in this movie, just goes to show how black tension underlies the majority of racial tension. Its ok for a black guy to knock other minorities and its sure as heck ok for him to knock white, but when it come to anyone even accidentally knocking blacks, they get beat down quick. The audience should think about this.
What is the most correct and moral way to navigate the racial ladder of our society?
The question is, do movies like this help in healing racial wounds and improving the underlying tension or does it just reinforce and promote preexisting negative feelings?

The New Meaning of Equality

"Underlying this equal-opportunity offensiveness is the notion that "teasing" an entire racial group by invoking some of its most pernicious stereotypes is no different from making fun of people who like to ski--a notion that willfully ignores the fact that racism and sexism are still very much a part of American culture. The line of defense--"We're all treated equally now, so we had no idea people would be offended!"--is in some ways more insulting that outright bigotry, which at least doesn't hide behind a pretense of equality" (Rachel Fudge, Bitchfest).

Is it just overreacting for Asians to get mad at shirts like this? A lot of people answered yes when the Abercrombie & Fitch controversy was underway. I think its very important for white critics to remember our place in society. Some claim that "we should all be equal. Anybody can make fun of white people, so we should in turn get to play with the stereotypes of others." These people need to wake up and realize that we are not equal and even though political rights are becoming more equal, societal rights aren't. Even after generations of races interacting on a more equal plain in our modern society, there will still always be a legacy of racism that can never be erased. People try to use the justification of how much progress we've made to print and sell t-shirts like this. This progress and illusion of equality are just that--illusions--excuses to be just as racist as ever and an attempt to use "equality" against those who have suffered from inequality for so long. Its a low blow and the White Man of America just needs to man up, stop playing games, and begin to give everyone "else" the equality they deserve.

A Funny Compromise

"In the mid-1980s good pitches or show ideas presented to producers, began to be defined as those appealing to both "urban" and mainstream" audiences. NBC, in particular boasted crossover hits such as The Cosby Show (the nation's number one program for five seasons), A Different World, and The Fresh Prince of Bel Air" (Kristal Brent Zook).

Ok, so everyone can agree that Fresh Prince and The Cosby Show were both a huge success. Black people and white people alike loved and still love them, watching and re-watching re-runs to this day. The thing about it though is that the families of the Huxtables and the Banks were not your typical "black families." So, some people may get mad at me for saying this and say I'm being racist and stereotyping, but the truth of the matter is that they both had mad money and unrealistic lives. The average black family does not have the mother as a lawyer and the father as a doctor and time to just have fun with the 5 kids. The average black family does not have a butler who cooks, clean, and answers the door to their mansion. Now this is not true for just black families, its true for white families too. If these same family were white with as much money and a butler and everything like that, the audience would view them as more upper class, but thats not the case. Mainstream audiences are able to relate to these families. It is because the families were black, they had to overcompensate by being super rich to be able to get on the same level as mainstream white audiences?

I'm not saying that either of these shows is a sell-out. Will definitely brings a street element to Bel Air as does Cockroach and other characters in the Cosby Show, however, its a strange mix of two world that ends up in a seemingly happy, but foundationally weak compromise.

Watch this clip of some of the "funniest moments" from Fresh Prince.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KUSR1PZ3meE

What are the situations? Will is in trouble for wrecking a car, he runs away with $20 bucks he tricks from his uncle, he and Carlton break into a house while Carlton is wearing all black and a ski mask. Carlton doesn't realize Wills already inside and he urgently says, "Will! There's a big black guy in the house!" Will is always roping Carlton into different schemes, hustling people, getting him to talk street, to act not as proper. These are the funniest moments on the show. Something just seems inconsistent. I can't exactly figure it out. It just seems like the wealth, the huge house, and nice neighborhood is the pass to be accepted in the white eye and the skin color and street element is what makes them "such successful black shows." They're funny shows and I love them, but when all is said and done, it does seem a lot like a funny compromise.